Losing Control & Setting Aside Pride

I am really entranced by Lady Antebellum's newest song "Need You Now,"  To be honest, I didn't like it at first.  I listened to the melody and found it not so very special.  After hearing more of the lyrics and understanding the words along with the harmonizing of the roles, I began to feel the song and the experience became so much more vivid\ having successfully awakened my own memories.

Most of us have experienced broken hearts, but if you haven't.. well, watch out.  Ha.  I am one of those jaded people that would rather not have an experience then have it rot on me... but you should stay optimistic.  It's better for you.  lLolL.  Anyway, for the weak-hearted person a broken heart yields little self control, lots of brooding, and emotional drainage.  So in the last stand against lonesomeness, what little parts of ourselves are left shattered.. . .. .  We fall and break, we toss aside our precious pride and make that call that we hope will make things better...  In reality, it doesn't.  But in the song, well... haha.. it doesn't either, but then serendipity later shows it was truly their fate to meet again.

I'm not so lucky, not that I'm asking for anything just...  In general, yours truly is a can of worms (albeit the tastiest darned can of worms you could ever dream of).  If you believe in fate and destiny, then you understand how frustrated and helpless I feel at times.  I know I should try to accept things as inevitable, but I can't.  My mind can reason it out like the most logically sane person in existence, but my heart speaks a language of its own so much more powerful and transcendent than any brain circuits of mine are capable of comprehending.

You know how some people can "get over" a situation and move on, learning or not learning from it but mainly, not letting it occupy their thoughts any longer?  Why am I so incapable!?  I have accepted things, the past, histories, sure, but it's like a burn scar that still hurts long after it's healed, still turns red hot and aches like the coldest winter on your bones.

I'm so melodramatic. I can't imagine myself any other way.

devyn